A to Z of Sports: Part Two (N-Z)


For part one, click here.

Hey, you, get over here!
It's time to expand my rhyming career
You've heard sports poetry from me before
But that was part one, dingus! There surely is more
For we have explored just the first letters
13 more await! I hope it's much better.

Shoot, I've lost track again!
Where were we, X? F? No, we're at N!

N is for NFL, where the football is tossed,
But watch out for players, they're big and they're rough.
Football is fun, it's easy to play,
Three strikes and your out,
Really, overall, I'd say it's okay.

O is for OSN, top of the heap
The elite sports media can't even compete
Do they even have a single sports rhyme?
If not then don't waste your time.

P is for ping pong.

Q is for Quidditch, the most magical game,
Some say it's fake, but who cares? It's a sport all the same.
Alright, I'll be honest: this wasn't my strongest,
But anything else won't be much better,
Because, let's face it, Q is a hard letter.

R is for racecar, the fastest around,
They're red, blue, green, and brown.
Look at it go, so fast and so quick!
Okay, maybe too fast, I'm gonna be sick.
Please slow down.

S is for Seychelles, we love it so,
A tax haven for us, saves so much dough.
Wait, did I say tax haven? Crap!
It's a legit operation--simple as that.
Bottom line, we conform to regulation,
We're proud to be associated
With this island nation.

T is for tennis, the sport with the net!
Avoid the ball at all costs and you'll be set.

U is for umbrella, to play sports when there's rain,
and V is for venue, be it a stadium, racetrack, or bowling lane.

W is for wakeboarding, something I know nothing about,
and X is for Xtreme Sports, fun stuff no doubt,
But it's spelled with an 'X', not an 'E'
Which, all things considered, is convenient for me.

Y is for Yankees, a base-ball team,
Famous for hotdogs, boiled and steamed.

Well well, we've made it at last.
I'm done with this stupid poem... but alas!
Z is a letter with not much to propose
I'm so close to the end
What is the final prose?

Screw it, Z is for Zports
It's close enough, I'll close my rhyming report.

Why did I agree to do all 26?
There's nothing inherently funny in this.
I guess I forgot how hard rhyming could be
I'm going home now to sleep in my tree.

Nate Odenkirk can be found in his sleeping tree.

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